Tuesday, August 19, 2008

THE TOP TEN MOST BIZARRE STAR WARS ALIENS

Ah, the Star Wars Universe... if it's anything Lucas got right (and there are some things), it was the creation of the plethora of alien lifeforms that inhabit it. From just the Cantina Scene alone in A New Hope we were inundated with some twenty different creatures barely on screen for a second or so at a time. Yet, be that as it may, recent authors have taken liberties with many, if not all, of these intergalactic being's back-stories and have made many common enough to garner their own Action Figures. As the original trilogy progressed, more and significantly wackier aliens were thrown into the mix up to and throughout the second series of three films. The following ten aliens are by far the most bizarre I could find. The idea was to gather a few that weren't on screen for more than minutes all told, so as odd as some of your favorites may have been, it was all determined by screen time for this list's purposes. Enjoy!




THATS NO MOON THATS NO MOON THATS NO MOON THATS NO MOON





10) THE TECHNO UNION DROID ARMY




"The techno union army is at your disposal, Count."
Wat Tambor to Count Dooku

The Techno Union Droid Army was a droid army owned by the Techno Union. During the Separatist crisis, Foreman Wat Tambor pledged the army to Count Dooku's Confederacy of Independent Systems, and was merged into the Separatist Droid Army.


Yes, I'm aware that Wat Tambor was on screen for a bit longer than just a few minutes, but I just really dug how he had to talk by adjusting a knob on his chest and essentially sounded like a walking Beat-Box. I can just see him in a Beck concert a la Bender in Futurama only jamming the fat beats rather than scratching his damaged chest. Yes, I just said, 'fat beats'. Sorry.






9) ELOM





"I thought you people were demons of chaos. I realize now that order sent you to protect us."
Ryannar N'on Dikasterar speaking to Kav Dryfus in an Imperial prison, as recorded in Kav Dryfus' journal

Eloms were short, stocky, bipedal sentients, with a thick pelt of oily, dark fur, native to the frigid and mineral-rich desert planet of Elom, located in the Borderland Regions. The primitive species had extremely tough skin, several layers of fat, and their hands and feet were coated by thick calluses.

First appearing on the Sail Barge among Jabba the Hutt and his mass collection of queer creatures, the Elom hangs back in the shadows and barely makes himself visible. I'm not 100% sure if the toy pic I found was from a real production action figure, or something from a fan's design, but either way, it's cool. I never had him if he was real... too bad, too. I'd have loved to get my hands on that one.







8) FLORN LAMPROID




"Six meters of muscle, teeth, and venom. Hyperfast reflexes and a vicious streak as wide as the Cron Drift. I'd say you're looking at the most efficient predator in history."
Tyro Viveca

The Florn Lamproids were a sapient carnivorous species from Florn, shaped into consummate predators by the many dangers of their homeworld. They were aggressive, ophidian colonizers who favored jungle and forest ecosystems. They had six limbs, with long black claws. Their well-muscled serpentine coils were strong enough to crush a bantha's skull, while their mouths were ringed with long fangs. They were also venomous, possessing a poison stinger on the tips of their tails as well as a milky poison in their saliva. Their oily skin was gray-green. A tiny wet sensory filament could be curled from between the yellow fangs to detect scent.


One of the best-known Florn Lamproids was Dice Ibegon, agent of the Alliance to Restore the Republic and lover of Lak Sivrak (See: Shistavanen Wolfman down a few) See this thing up there? Yeah, I have this serious issue with nasty looking things that remind me of seventh-grade science featuring me, a scalpel, and a agar platter full o' flatworm. Ugh!





7) MUSTAFARIANS






"I am sending you to the Mustafar system in the Outer Rim. It is a volcanic planet. You will be safe there."
General Grievous to the Separatist Council



The two subspecies of Mustafarians had different physiologies as well as different roles in their society. The northern Mustafarians were significantly taller than their cousins and physically weaker. Because of their frail physiology, those who served as sentries commonly had their limbs enhanced with cybernetic prosthetics.

The southern Mustafarians were stronger and shorter in stature than their northern cousins. They handled the "heavy lifting" jobs of the their planet's lava mining. The southerners could withstand higher temperatures than northerners as well. Since they spent more time near the lava, they wore breath masks and thick armor to compensate.


If you can find a decent picture, outside of the massive book that I have, of a Mustafarian without its heat-resistant armor on, you will then realize just how completely wacky these beings are. Trust me. Really wacky.





6) SHISTAVANEN WOLFMAN







"Good, I'm ready for food, fresh food… wet food."
Hovrak

The Shistavanens, colloquially nicknamed “wolfmen” for their lupine appearance, were a biped species from the planets of the Uvena system, such as Uvena Prime and Uvena III.Lak Sivrak was an Imperial scout who developed a reputation for success, and became an important asset to the Galactic Empire. The isolation associated with Sivrak's deep space scout work cut him off from the news of the Rebel Alliance's open opposition to the Empire. In Mos Eisley, hidden away from his employers, Sivrak dreamed of helping the Rebel Alliance as a scout. Finally his dream came true when he met Dice Ibegon, a Florn Lamproid. Lak Sivrak fell in love with Ibegon, and they left the Mos Eisley cantina. Both Lak and Dice joined the Rebels


From what I understand, the mask later used for Lak Sivrak from the ANH Cantina Scene, was actually a piece from a horror movie being shot around the same time. That's damn cool.





5) BARAGWIN







I Couldn't Find a Cool Quote, So Here's Some Equally Cool Bits O' Trivia:

In Return of the Jedi, mime artist Philip Herbert wore a full-body creature suit to portray Hermi Odle.

Hermi's deformed lip is unique to him, Baragwins generally have normal lips, like the Jedi Astaal Vilbum.

Hermi Odle is likely a take on 'Hear Me Yodel'.

Although Odle is supposed to have shot Pote Snitkin on Jabba's sail barge, Snitkin was not aboard the barge; he was driving one of the skiffs.



Baragwin were easily recognized by their hunched backs, wrinkled skin, and large heads mounted on thick necks. There were no obvious differences between male and female Baragwin. Hermi Odle was one of the aliens in Jabba the Hutt's employment at his desert palace. Odle was a large Baragwin who wore a tattered cloak and had droopy lips. He took up residence on Tatooine after his ship was shot down by an Imperial patrol. He was employed by Jabba after he impressed the Hutt with his weapon-making skills.





4) WHIPHID







"My goodness, stop blathering. I do not handle business like some other crime lords do. I think this can be settled quietly. I understand that the shipment was lost. Consider yourself on probation, and report for your next assignment. The value of the cargo will be deducted from your cut of this new shipment. This time."
Lady Valarian, to an employee


Whiphids were tall, muscled, furred sentient beings from the planet Toola. They were notable for their great tusks. On Toola, Whiphids lived a primitive lifestyle, hunting caraboose and other large animals, such as the motmot, their favored prey. Their language consisted of approximately six thousand words. As Whiphids came into contact with more technically advanced races that came to Toola to buy ice, they began to show great curiosity about the rest of the galaxy. Many Whiphids left Toola, supporting themselves as big game hunters, mercenaries, or bounty hunters.

Famous Whiphids included the crime lord Lady Valarian, the Jedi Master K'Kruhk and the criminal spy J'Quille.


There is a scene in Episode II where Yoda, while training a class of youngling Jedi's, is interrupted by Obi Wan and one of his students is a Whiphid. Apparently, many are quite in tune with the force.




3) AMANAMAN





Since Amanaman Doesn't Talk, Well... No Quotes. Again. Here's Some FAST FACTS!

Amanaman can be seen several times in Jabba's Palace. He is first seen when Jabba reveals Han Solo frozen in carbonite. He can also be seen when the Max Rebo Band performs—although he is reclining so he is hard to spot—, he is seen again when Leia and Han are discovered, and the last time he is seen is when Luke and Han are sentenced to death.


The Amanin (singular, Amani), sometimes called Amanaman, were a primitive race from the planet Maridun. Amanin were hard to miss in a crowd, being two to three meters tall with bright yellow and green skin, arms long enough to reach the ground, and very short legs. They were found in the galaxy at large as mercenaries, heavy laborers and wilderness scouts.






2) CHEVIN






"We are the slaves, to our own laziness, to our own comforts. We are nothing more than parasites, feeding on the lives of our fellows. This must stop."
from Ephant Mon's memoirs


Ephant Mon was a Chevin male from the planet Vinsoth. Despite his awkward appearance, Mon was a skilled and powerful combatant, and during his youth, he was considered handsome by Chevin standards. He started off as a mercenary in his youth before becoming a gunrunner, supplying arms to all sorts of military factions, from planetary militia groups to the more organized Rebel Alliance. His goods were usually stolen Imperial weapons which, though outdated, were still serviceable. Mon also worked as a slaver at some point in his lengthy life.


I love this guy! Not only does his face look like a slice of sausage in the shape of a slide, but he appears as though he could, at any given time, eat you. Very cool.





1) ADVOZSE






"Bom Vimdin is a true mercenary: one who would sell his soul, the fate of his people, and even that of the galaxy for a few credits. He cares little for what happens to those he harms provided the credit balance in his account grows."
Airen Cracken



Advozsec (singular: Advozse) were a humanoid species, easily distinguished by the single horn on top of their hairless heads. Their home planet of Riflor was geologically unstable, with frequent volcanic eruptions: a condition which shaped their culture and their place in the galaxy.


I came across this dude not only from ANH, but also in the very same book I spoke of earlier. He immediately caught my eye as easily the most bizarre, and some how scary, beast in the galaxy. No wonder that Cantina Scene used to scare the piss out of me when I was a tot. THIS GUY!







1 comment:

  1. nice, i just love star wars aliens.

    ReplyDelete

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